Empire Strikes Back...

The Loony Bin ( loonies@bloodaxe.com )
Tue, 30 Jan 2001 22:52:44 +0000


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Here's one for the Star Wars fans...this one's from Pete...

Wishes & Dreams...

- ANDREA
        xx

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  ------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------


Here's some extra footage that they put in the special release of Empire
Strikes Back...

INT: BESPIN GANTRY - MOMENTS LATER:

A furious lightsaber duel is underway. DARTH VADER is backing LUKE
SKYWALKER towards the end of the gantry.

A quick move by Vader, chops off Luke's hand! It goes spinning off into
the ventilation shaft.

Luke backs away. He looks around, but realizes there's nowhere to go but
straight down.

Darth Vader: Obi Wan never told you what happened to your father.

Luke: He told me enough! He told me you killed him!

Darth Vader: No... I am your father!

Luke: No, it's not true! It's impossible.

Darth Vader: Search your feelings... you know it to be true...

Luke: NO!

Darth Vader: Yes, it is true.. and you know what else? You know that
brass droid of yours?

Luke: Threepio?

Darth Vader: Yes... Threepio... I built him... when I was 7 years old...

Luke: No...

Darth Vader: Seven years old! And what have you done? Look at yourself,
no hand, no job, and couldn't even levitate your own ship out of the
swamp...

Luke: I destroyed your precious Death Star!

Darth Vader: When you were 20! When I was 10, I single-handedly
destroyed a Trade Federation Droid Control ship!

Luke: Well, it's not my fault...

Darth Vader: Oh, here we go... "Poor me... my father never gave me what
I wanted for my birthday... boo hoo, my daddy's the Dark Lord of the
Sith...waahhh wahhh!"

Luke: Shut up...

Darth Vader: You're a slacker! By the time I was your age, I had
exterminated the Jedi knights!

Luke: I used to race my T-16 through Beggar's Canyon...

Darth Vader: Oh, for the love of the Emperor... 10 years old, winner of
the Boonta Eve Open... Only human to ever fly a Pod Racer... right here
baby!

Luke looks down the shaft. Takes a step towards it.

Darth Vader: I was wrong... You're not my kid... I don't know whose you
are, but you sure ain't mine...

Luke takes a step off the platform, hesitates, then plunges down the
shaft.

Darth Vader looks after him.

Darth Vader: Get a haircut!


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