Politically Correct...

The Loony Bin ( loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk )
Sun, 1 Dec 1996 01:38:09 +0000


Hiya All...

Here are some PC terms you should know...

Wishes & Dreams...

- ANDREA
        xx

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  ------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------


Politically correct usage for you married people

     She does not:
     GET PMS
     She becomes:
     HORMONALLY HOMICIDAL

     She does not have:
     A KILLER BODY
     She is:
     TERMINALLY ATTRACTIVE

     She is not:
     A BAD COOK
     She is:
     MICROWAVE COMPATIBLE

     She is not:
     A BAD DRIVER
     She is:
     AUTOMOTIVELY CHALLENGED

     She is not a:
     PERFECT 10
     She is:
     NUMERICALLY SUPERIOR

     She is not:
     EASY
     She is:
     HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE

     She does not:
     HATE SPORTS ON TV
     She is:
     ATHLETICALLY BIASED

     She does not have:
     SEXY LIPS
     She is:
     COLLAGEN DEPENDENT

     She does not get:
     DRUNK
     She is:
     ACCIDENTALLY OVER-SERVED

     You do not ask her:
     TO DANCE
     You request a:
     PRE-COITAL RHYTHMIC EXPERIENCE

     She is not:
     A GOSSIP
     She is a:
     VERBAL TERMINATOR

     She does not:
     WORK OUT TOO MUCH
     She is an:
     ABDOMINAL OVERACHIEVER

     She does not have:
     A GREAT BUTT
     She is:
     GLUTEUS TO THE MAXIMUS

     She is not:
     HOOKED ON SOAP OPERAS
     She is:
     MELODRAMATICALLY FIXATED


     She is not:
     COLD OR FRIGID
     She is:
     THERMALLY INCOMPATIBLE

     She does not:
     WEAR TOO MUCH MAKE-UP
     She is:
     COSMETICALLY OVERSATURATED

     She does not have:
     GREAT CLEAVAGE (A GREAT RACK)
     Her breasts are:
     CENTRALLY LOCATED

     She will never:
     GAIN WEIGHT
     She will become:
     A METABOLIC UNDERACHIEVER

     She is not:
     A SCREAMER OR MOANER
     She is:
     VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE

     She does not:
     SHAVE HER LEGS
     She experiences:
     TEMPORARY STUBBLE REDUCTION

     She does not have:
     A HARD BODY
     She is:
     ANATOMICALLY INFLEXIBLE

     She does not:
     SUN BATHE
     She experiences:
     SOLAR ENHANCEMENT

     Her breast will never:
     SAG
     They will:
     LOSE THEIR VERTICAL HOLD

     She does not:
     SHOP TOO MUCH
     She is:
     OVERLY SUSCEPTIBLE TO MARKETING PLOYS

     She does not:
     CUT YOU OFF
     She becomes:
     HORIZONTALLY INACCESSIBLE

     She does not have:
     BIG HAIR
     She is:
     OVERLY AEROSOLED

     She does not:
     SNORE
     She is:
     NASALLY REPETITIVE

     She does not:
     GET DRUNK
     She becomes:
     VERBALLY DYSLEXIC

     She does not have:
     BIG HOOTERS
     Her:
     CUPS RUNNETH OVER

     She is not:
     TOO SKINNY
     She is:
     SKELETALLY PROMINENT