The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk
)
Tue, 18 Jun 1996 08:03:36 +0100
Hiya People...
Here's a letter of appeal from the Bill Clinton Statue
Committee...please give generously...
Wishes & Dreams...
- ANDREA
xx
************<andrea@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk>************
******************<ajc6@ukc.ac.uk>*******************
*** ***
*** THE LOONY BIN ***
*** loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk ***
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******************Internet Goddess*******************
*********************ANDROMEDA***********************
------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------
Bill Clinton Statue Committee
1040 Buffoon Street
Little Rock, Arkansas 72205
June 14, 1996
Mr. /Ms. Clueless Clinton Supporter
666 Blindman's Bluff Road
La-La Land, USA
Dear Clueless:
We have the distinguished honor of being on the committee for raising
five million dollars for placing a statue of Bill Clinton in the Hall of
Fame in Washington, DC. This committee has been in a quandary as to
where to place the statue.
It would not be wise to place it beside the statue of George Washington,
who never told a lie, nor beside Jessie Jackson, who never told the
truth, since Bill Clinton could never tell the difference. We finally
decided to place it next to Christopher Columbus, the greatest Democrat
of all. He left not knowing where he was going, did not know where he
was, returned not knowing where he had been and did it all on borrowed
money.
Over 5000 years ago, Moses said to the children of Israel, "Pick up your
shovels, mount your asses and camels and I will lead you to the Promised
Land." Roosevelt said, "Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, and
light up a Camel. This is the Promised Land!"
Now Bill Clinton is going to steal your shovel, kick your ass, raise
the taxes on Camels, and mortgage the Promised Land. If you are one of
the fortunate people who has anything left after paying taxes, we expect
a generous contribution to our worthwhile project.
Respectfully,
Bill Clinton Statue Committee
P.S.
It is said that Bill Clinton is considering changing the Democratic
Party emblem from a donkey to a condom because it stands for inflation,
protects a bunch of pricks, halts production, and gives a false sense of
security while being screwed.