Dog Person...

The Loony Bin ( )
Wed, 19 Jan 2000 16:50:51 +0000

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I'm a dog person...the following silliness means something to me...

Wishes & Dreams...


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  ------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------


* Your jewellery box contains no jewels - just those fasteners from

* Every time you read the name, Bob, you think the guy's first name is
Best of Breed.

* You ask your vet if you can ride in her sports car sometime.

* Your house isn't carpeted - the fuzzy furballs under your feet are
soft enough.

* Your hungry hubby comes home from work, lifts the cover of the pan on
the stove and says, "Is this people food or dog food?"

* Your hungry hubby once ate the dog food and asked for seconds.

* Your mother-in-law keeps asking when you are going to have children.

* You don't give a second thought to using the brush you just used on
your dog to give a quick run through your own hair.

* At your dinner parties, you always double check the butter before
putting it on the table.

* You put important papers in your latest issue of your breed magazine.
You know you will find them there.

* You have dog hair stuck on tape on wrapped gifts.

* You have dog toy/treats in your briefcase.

* You have several albums filled with the 8 by 10 pictures of your dogs,
but you can't locate any pictures of your kids to send to grandma.

* You show up at the car dealers with a ruler, to measure and see if
your big dog crate will fit. Before the actual purchase, you make the
dealer cringe by insisting that you load both crates and dog into the
shiny, new vehicle to make sure it works!

* You can't get the groceries in the car because its: a) already full of
dog food or b) you have that big old crate in there.

* You visit relatives only if there is a dog show nearby.

* You remove all the seats from the van except the two in the front so
you have room for crates.

* The passenger seat is full of dog stuff.

* You cringe at the price of food in the grocery store, but think
nothing of the cost of dog food or treats.

* You have six squeaky hedgehogs...but only one with a squeaky that

* Your mother knows the implication of a "major breaking".

* You put popcorn in the clean dog dish for a movie treat.

* You pull out your credit card and little bits of liver are stuck to

* When you get your latest roll of film and there isn't a single picture
of a two-legged person in it.

* People at work have stopped offering you their lint brushes. They
realize it is a hopeless case.

* Friends no longer ask, "how was your weekend"; they ask "how did the
dogs do?"

* All babies and youngsters are "people puppies".

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