Be Careful...

The Loony Bin ( loonies@bloodaxe.com )
Thu, 14 Oct 1999 05:09:04 +0100


The Loony Bin - http://loonies.net800.co.uk/

Hiya Loonies...

Here's a warning for you...look out for yourselves...

Wishes & Dreams...

- ANDREA
        xx

*********THE LOONY BIN****loonies@bloodaxe.com*********
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************ANDROMEDA******Internet Goddess************

  ------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------

 
I know this guy whose neighbor, a young man named Richard Brunner, was
home recovering from having been served a rat in his bucket of Kentucky
Fried  Chicken (which was like deja vu as earlier in the day he found a
mouse inside his Coke can). 

He had a big fight that night with his new girlfriend Francesca Irina
Deeyenda and so anyway, he went to sleep and when he awoke he was in his
bathtub and it was full of ice and he was sore all over.
 
When he got out of the tub he realized that HIS KIDNEYS HAD BEEN STOLEN,
and he saw a note pinned to his pillow that said "Call 911!" 

But he was afraid to use his phone because it was connected to his
computer, and there was a virus on his computer that would destroy his
hard drive if he opened an e-mail entitled "Join the crew!"
 
He knew it wasn't a hoax because he himself was a computer programmer
who was working on software to save us from Armageddon when the year
2000 rolls around. His program will prevent a global disaster in which
all the computers get together and distribute the $600 Neiman Marcus
cookie recipe under the leadership of Bill Gates. (It's true-I read it
all last week in a mass e-mail from BILL GATES HIMSELF, who was also
promising me a free Disneyworld vacation and $5,000 if I would forward
the e-mail to everyone I know.)
 
The poor man then tried to call 911 from a pay phone to report his
missing kidneys, but reaching into the coin-return slot he got jabbed
with an HIV-infected needle around which was wrapped a note that said,
"Welcome to the world of AIDS." 

Luckily, he was only a few blocks from the hospital - the one, actually,
where that little boy who is dying of cancer is, the one whose last wish
is for everyone in the world to send him an e-mail and the American
Cancer Society has agreed to pay him a nickel for every e-mail he
receives.
 
I sent him two e-mails and one of them was a bunch of x's and o's in the
he shape of an angel (if you get it and forward it to twenty people you
will have good luck but ten people you will only have ok luck and if you
send it to less than ten people you will have BAD LUCK FOR SEVEN YEARS).
 
So anyway the poor guy tried to drive himself to the hospital, but on
the way he noticed another car driving along without his lights on. To
be helpful, he flashed his lights at him and was promptly shot as part
of a gang initiation. 

And it's a little-known fact that the Y1K problem caused the Dark Ages.


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