Computers and electronics according to Hollywood

The Loony Bin ( loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk )
Wed, 15 May 1996 12:16:09 +0100


Hiya Folks...

So who likes to spot these these things...???

Wishes & Dreams...

- ANDREA
        xx
-- 
************<andrea@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk>************
******************<ajc6@ukc.ac.uk>*******************
***                                               ***
***                THE LOONY BIN                  ***
***          loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk         ***
***                                               ***
******************Internet Goddess*******************
*********************ANDROMEDA***********************

  ------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------


COMPUTERS & ELECTRONICS (as depicted in movies, naturally) 

Word processors never display a cursor.  

You never have to use the space-bar when typing long sentences.  

All monitors display inch-high letters. 

High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA, or some such
governmental institution, will have easy to understand graphical
interfaces. Those that don't, have incredibly powerful text-based
command shells that can correctly understand and execute commands typed
in plain English.  
Corollary: you can gain access to any information you want by simply 
typing "ACCESS ALL OF THE SECRET FILES" on any keyboard.  

Likewise, you can infect a computer with a destructive virus by simply
typing "UPLOAD VIRUS" (see "Fortress").  

All computers are connected.  You can access the information on the 
villain's desktop computer, even if it's turned off.  

Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or whenever the screen 
changes.  

Some computers also slow down the output on the screen so that it
doesn't go faster than you can read.  The *really* advanced ones also
emulate the sound of a dot-matrix printer.  

All computer panels have thousands of volts and flash pots just
underneath the surface.  Malfunctions are indicated by a bright flash, a 
puff of smoke, a shower of sparks, and an explosion that forces you 
backwards.  

People typing away on a computer will turn it off without saving the
data.  

A hacker can get into the most sensitive computer in the world before
intermission and guess the secret password in two tries.  

Any PERMISSION DENIED has an OVERRIDE function (see "Demolition Man" and 
countless others).  

Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will be
accomplished in under three seconds. Movie modems usually appear to
transmit data at the speed of two gigabytes per second (except text,
which often can run as slow as 3-4 characters per second)

When the power plant/missile site/whatever overheats, all the control 
panels will explode, as will the entire building.  

If a disk has got encrypted files, you are automatically asked for a 
password when you try to access it.  

No matter what kind of computer disk it is, it'll be readable by any
system you put it into. 

All application software is usable by all computer platforms. The more 
high-tech the equipment, the more buttons it has (Aliens). However, 
everyone must have been highly trained, because the buttons aren't 
labelled.  

Most computers, no matter how small, have reality-defying three-
dimensional, active animation, photo-realistic graphics capability.
Laptops, for some strange reason, always seem to have amazing real-time 
video phone capabilities and the performance of a CRAY Supercomputer.  

Whenever a character looks at a VDU, the image is so bright that it
projects itself onto his/her face (see "Alien", "2001").