The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.com
)
Thu, 05 Sep 02 02:54:30 +0100
Hiya Loonies...
We've all seen scam emails, such as the ever-popular Nigerian cash
fraud, but now there's a new variation...
Wishes & Dreams...
- ANDREA
xx
******* THE LOONY BIN **** loonies@bloodaxe.com *******
Archive: http://www.theloonies.co.uk/
*********** ANDROMEDA **** Internet Goddess ***********
------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------
Dear Sir,
I am an Uruk of Mordor, charged with the discovery of a number of
valuable treasures within Moria. It has come to my notice that the
mithril hoard previously owned by Ori of the land of Moria has been
found by one of our cave-trolls. Under our laws, the hoard will be
shared between our lord Sauron and the local Balrog, but so far neither
knows the extent of the treasure.
Sir, I come to you as a respectful businessperson in order that we may
derive some profit ourselves from this venture, I would wish that I
could arrange for the transfer of half of the find to yourself, costing
roughly 20,000 silver pennies. From this amount, I will then arrange for
a further such that 25% remains your own, 5% goes for sundry costs
(including hire of strong Rohan horses for use in transportation), 5% is
given in bribe to the cave troll to ensure the quantity reported to our
respective Lords is adjusted, 65% belongs to myself and my fellow Orcs.
In order that this be accomplished, I ask only that you provide details
of:
Your willingness to participate in this venture,
Confirmation that you will not speak of this venture to anyone else, or
wear any magic rings,
Your race and land of residence,
The location of your local Palantir or identity of your preferred
message-carrying bird or beast,
Your given name, and any name you are known by in the Western lands,
The number of ponies you possess.
I look forward to your returning correspondence, which can be whispered
to any passing magpie. I trust that you will ensure that no other dark
feathered birds come to hear of this transaction.
Please include this information if you forward this joke:
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http://www.theloonies.co.uk/
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