A New Parents' Dictionary...

The Loony Bin ( loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk )
14 Apr 1998 01:06:48 -0000


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Hiya Loonies...

Here's hoping everyone had a great Easter...

Wishes & Dreams...

- ANDREA
	xx

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***                 THE LOONY BIN                   ***
***           loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk          ***
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*******************Internet Goddess********************
**********************ANDROMEDA************************

  ------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------

A NEW PARENTS DICTIONARY

Whether you  are a new parent, a parent for many years or just a
big kid, here are some previously misunderstood definitions
clarified.

AMNESIA:
The condition that enables a woman who has gone through labour 
to have sex again.

DUMBWAITER:
One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.

FAMILY PLANNING:
The art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to
keep you on the edge of financial disaster.

FEEDBACK:
The inevitable result when the baby doesn't appreciate the
strained carrots.

FULL NAME:
What you call your child when you're mad at him.

GRANDPARENTS:
The people who think your children are wonderful even though
they're sure you're not raising them right.

HEARSAY:
What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.

TOP BUNK:
Where you should never put a child wearing Superman pajamas.

IMPREGNABLE:
A woman whose memory of labour is still vivid.

INDEPENDENT:
How we want our children to be as long as they do everything we
say.

OW:
The first word spoken by children with older siblings

PRENATAL:
When your life was still somewhat your own.

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