The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk
)
Sun, 22 Dec 1996 22:00:55 +0000
Hiya Folks...
Here's a diary of someone's experiences of the Christmas season...
Wishes & Dreams...
- ANDREA
xx
***<andrea@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk>****<ajc6@ukc.ac.uk>***
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*******************Internet Goddess********************
**********************ANDROMEDA************************
------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------
December 8:
6:00pm and it's starting to snow. The first of the season - the wife and
I took our cocktails and sat by the window watching the soft flakes
drift down all over the area, it was BEAUTIFUL.
December 9:
We awoke to a big beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering the
landscape. What a fantastic sight! Every tree and shrub covered by a
beautiful mantle. I shovelled snow for the first time in years and loved
it. I did both the driveway and sidewalks. Later a snow plough came
through and covered our sidewalk with compacted snow from the street so
I shovelled it again.
December 12:
The sun has melted all our lovely snow. Oh well, I'm sure we will get
some more before the lovely winter is through.
December 14:
It snowed 8 inches last night and the temperature dropped to 20 below
zero. Shovelled the driveway and sidewalks again and then the snow
plough came by and did it's trick again.
December 15:
Sold my van and bought a 4x4 so I can drive in the snow. Bought snow
tyres for my wife's car.
December 16:
Fell on my ass on the ice in the driveway. All that was hurt were my
feelings.
December 17:
Still cold (below zero in the am) and icy roads make for tough driving.
December 20:
Had another 14 inches of this white sh*t last night. More shovelling in
store for me today. The goddamn snow plough came by twice.
December 22:
We are assured of a white Christmas because 13 inches of that sh*t fell
today and with this ing freezing weather it won't melt 'till August. Got
all dressed up to go out and shovel (boots, jump-suit, heavy jacket,
earmuffs, gloves ect) and then got the urge to go to the small room.
December 23:
I was going to go ice fishing today but the f***ing worms froze and I
didn't want the fish to break their teeth on my bait!
December 24:
If I ever catch the git that drives that plough I'll drag him through
the snow by his balls! I think he hides around the corner and waits for
me to finish shovelling and then comes down the street at 100 miles an
hour throwing that sh*t all over what used to be my lawn!
December 25:
MERRY CHRISTMAS! They predict 20 more inches of this white bull sh*t.
I wonder if they know how many shovels full of snow 20 inches is??
Idiots!! $%&* Santa, he doesn't have to bust his nuts shovelling this
#$%&. The snow plough driver came by and asked for a donation. So I
wrapped him on the side of his head with the snow shovel.