The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk
)
Fri, 9 Aug 1996 02:23:33 +0100
Hiya All... Have you ever wondered if you've made an idiot of yourself in a job interview...???...well these folks have...thanks to Alan for sending it... Wishes & Dreams... - ANDREA xx ************<andrea@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk>************ *****<ajc6@ukc.ac.uk>***<bloodaxe@geocities.com>***** *** *** *** THE LOONY BIN *** *** loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk *** *** *** ******************Internet Goddess******************* *********************ANDROMEDA*********************** ------- Forwarded foolishness follows ------- MEMORABLE INTERVIEWS Vice Presidents and personnel directors of the one hundred largest corporations were asked to describe their most unusual experience interviewing prospective employees: * A job applicant challenged the interviewer to an arm wrestle. * Interviewee wore a Walkman, explaining that she could listen to the interviewer and the music at the same time. * Candidate fell and broke arm during interview. * Candidate announced she hadn't had lunch and proceeded to eat a hamburger and french fries in the interviewer's office. * Candidate explained that her long-term goal was to replace the interviewer. * Candidate said he never finished high school because he was kidnapped and kept in a closet in Mexico. * Balding Candidate excused himself and returned to the office a few minutes later wearing a hairpiece. * Applicant said if he was hired he would demonstrate his loyalty by having the corporate logo tattooed on his forearm. * Applicant interrupted interview to phone her therapist for advice on how to answer specific interview questions. * Candidate brought large dog to interview. * Applicant refused to sit down and insisted on being interviewed standing up. * Candidate dozed off during interview. The employers were also asked to list the "most unusual" questions that have been asked by job candidates: * "What is it that you people do at this company?" * "What is the company motto?" * "Why aren't you in a more interesting business?" * "What are the zodiac signs of all the board members?" * "Why do you want references?" * "Do I have to dress for the next interview?" * "I know this is off the subject, but will you marry me?" * "Will the company move my rock collection from California to Maryland?" * "Will the company pay to relocate my horse?" * "Does your health insurance cover pets?" * "Would it be a problem if I'm angry most of the time?" * "Does your company have a policy regarding concealed weapons?" * "Do you think the company would be willing to lower my pay?" * "Why am I here?" Also included are a number of unusual statements made by candidates during the interview process: * I have no difficulty in starting or holding my bowel movement. * At times I have the strong urge to do something harmful or shocking. * I feel uneasy indoors. * Sometimes I feel like smashing things. * Women should not be allowed to drink in cocktail bars. * I think that Lincoln was greater than Washington. * I get excited very easily. * Once a week, I usually feel hot all over. * I am fascinated by fire. * I like tall women. * Whenever a man is with a woman he is usually thinking about sex. * People are always watching me. * If I get too much change in a store, I always give it back. * Almost everyone is guilty of bad sexual conduct. * I must admit that I am a pretty fair talker. * I never get hungry. * I know who is responsible for most of my troubles * If the pay was right, I'd travel with the carnival. * I would have been more successful if nobody would have snitched on me. * My legs are really hairy.