The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.com)
Thu, 25 Mar 04 22:48:02 -0000
Hiya All...
Here, in a nutshell, is the history of Silicon Valley...
Wishes & Dreams...
- ANDREA
xx
******* THE LOONY BIN **** loonies@bloodaxe.com
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Archive: http://www.theloonies.co.uk/
*********** ANDROMEDA **** Internet Goddess ***********
------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------
ALL-TOO-FAMILIAR SILICON VALLEY DIARY
-------------------------------------
Fed up with California? Have sympathy for the Salt of the Valley!
January
Love my new job here in Silicon Valley. My salary is 30% higher! I have
stock options! The temperature outside is 65F in winter! California is
the best place on earth!!! Sure glad I moved out here.
February
Still looking for an apartment. Freeways everywhere to take you places.
Love California!
March
Found a 1-bedroom apartment for $1900/mo. California is a bit more
expensive than I thought.
April
Gas hit $2.29/gal. Somebody stole the gas from my car. That sucks...
May
A small earthquake! And this is what everyone was so worried about?
Almost didn't feel it.
June
A forest fire and a mud slide near LA. Who cares, that is far away from
me!
July
A big earthquake... Spent 4 hours in my bathtub. Boy, that was scary.
Glad we didn't have no stinking earthquakes where I grew up.
August
Drought! They turn on the water once a day. This sucks big time!
Somebody stole the water from my car's radiator. Why did I come to
California?
September
Decided to buy a house. Found a 2-bedroom fixer-upper for $800K.
Borrowed against my stock options for down payment. Freeway traffic is
worse. Today it took nearly two hours to get to and from work...each
way.
October
My startup fired 90% of the work force, including me. The stock lost 98%
of its value. My options are underwater.
November
Had to sell my house. Couldn't make the payments. Found a studio
apartment for $2300/mo. The traffic is unbearable
December
Problems with electricity. They turn the electricity off several times a
day. It's called "rolling blackouts." Somebody stole my car
battery...what do I do now?
January
I'm typing this, stuck in an elevator, in complete darkness. The battery
of my laptop is dying. Silicon Valley is no more. Angry hordes of former
dot-commers are looting in the dark. It was fun while it lasted.
I'm coming back home tomorrow.
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