The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.com
)
Thu, 14 Oct 1999 06:40:08 +0100
The Loony Bin - http://loonies.net800.co.uk/
Hiya Folks...
Here's a Canadian one sent in by a genuine Canadian...Alan...
Wishes & Dreams...
- ANDREA
xx
*********THE LOONY BIN****loonies@bloodaxe.com*********
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************ANDROMEDA******Internet Goddess************
------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------
SIGNS YOU MAY BE CANADIAN
1. You stand in "line-ups" at the movies, not lines.
2. You're not offended by the term, "Homo Milk".
3. You understand the phrase, "Could you please pass me a serviette, I
just spilled my poutine."
4. You eat chocolate bars instead of candy bars.
5. You drink pop, not soda.
6. You know what it means to be 'on a pogey'.
7. You know that a mickey and 2-4's mean "Party at the camp, eh!"
8. You can drink legally while still a 'teen.
9. You talk about the weather with strangers and friends alike.
10. You don't know or care about the fuss with Cuba, it's just a cheap
place to travel to and has good cigars.
11. When there is a social problem, you turn to your government to fix
it instead of telling them to stay out of it.
12. You're not sure if the leader of our nation has ever had sex and
don't want to know if he has!
13. You get milk in bags as well as cartons and plastic jugs.
14. Pike is a type of fish, not some part of a highway.
15. You drive on a highway, not a freeway.
16. You sit on a chesterfield. not a couch.
17. You know what a Robertson screwdriver is.
18. You have Canadian Tire money in your kitchen drawers.
19. You know that Thrills are something to chew and taste like soap.
20. You know that Mounties "don't always look like that."
21. You dismiss all beers under 6% as for "children and the elderly".
22. You know that the Friendly Giant isn't a vegetable product line.
23. You know that Casey and Finnegan are not a Celtic musical group.
24. You participated in "Participaction".
25. You have an Inuit carving by your bedside with the rationale "What's
good enough protection for the Prime Minister is good enough for
me".
26. You wonder why there isn't a 5 dollar coin yet.
27. Unlike any international assassin/terrorist/spy in the world, you
don't possess a Canadian passport.
28. You use a red pen on your non-Canadian textbooks and fill in the
missing u's from labor, honor and color.
29. You know the French equivalents of "free", "prize" and "no sugar
added", thanks to your extensive education in bilingual cereal
packaging.
30. You are excited whenever an American television show mentions
Canada.
31. You make a mental note to talk about it at work the next day.
32. You can do all the hand actions to Sharon, Lois and Bram's
"Skin-a-ma-rinky-doo" opus.
33. You can eat more than one maple sugar candy without feeling
nauseous.
34. You were mad when "The Beachcombers" were taken off the air.
35. You know what a toque is.
36. You have some momento of Doug and Bob.
37. You admit Rich Little is a Canadian and you're glad Jerry Lewis is
not.
38. You know Toronto is not a province.
39. You never miss "Coaches Corner".
40. Backbacon and Kraft Dinner are two of the food groups.
41. Snow is not "evil".
42. People around the world think you're American, then love you when
they find out you're not!
43. You know that a "fanny pak" is a pouch you wear around your waist.
44. Any day above 10 degrees C is shorts weather.
Please include this information if you forward this joke:
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