Quotes and ponderables...

The Loony Bin ( loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk )
Tue, 26 Aug 1997 23:54:17 +0100


Hiya Folks...

Alan has sent us some more things to think about...

Wishes & Dreams...

- ANDREA
        xx

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  ------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------

QUOTES AND OTHER PONDERABLES:


Bigamy is having one wife too many.  Monogamy is the same. - Oscar Wilde
*******

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?"
The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"
The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?"
The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with
that?"
*******

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because
I hate plants. - A. Whitney Brown
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A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely
rearranging their prejudices. - William James
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The Lord's Prayer is 66 words, the Gettysburg Address is 286 words,
there are 1,322 words in the Declaration of Independence, but government
regulations on the sale of cabbage total 26,911 words.
- From an article on the growth of federal regulations in the Oct. 24th
issue of National Review
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Half of the people in the world are below average.
*******

Writing about music is like dancing about architecture.
*******

On a tombstone:  "I TOLD YOU I WAS SICK"
*******

Somebody hits me, I'm going to hit him back.  Even if it does look like
he hasn't eaten in a while.
- Charles Barkley, after blatantly elbowing an Angolan basketball
opponent in the Olympics.
*******

Suppose you were an idiot..... And suppose you were a member of
Congress................But I repeat myself. - Mark Twain
*******

Calvin:  People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they
don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world.
Hobbes:  Isn't your pants' zipper supposed to be in the front?
*******

Laundry instructions on a shirt made by HEET (Korea): For best results: 
Wash in cold water separately, hang dry and iron with warm iron.  For
not so good results:  Drag behind car through puddles, blow-dry on
roofrack.
*******

The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be
when you kill them. - William Clayton
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"Time's fun when you're having flies."  - Kermit the Frog
*******

A preacher visits an elderly woman from his congregation.  As he sits on
the couch he notices a large bowl of peanuts on the coffee table.
"Mind if I have a few" he asks.  
"No, not at all" the woman replied.
They chat for an hour and as the preacher stands to leave, he realizes
that instead of eating just a few peanuts, he emptied most of the bowl.
"I'm terribly sorry for eating all your peanuts, I really just meant to
eat a few."
"Oh thats all right" the woman says. "Ever since I lost my teeth all I
can do is suck the chocolate off them."
*******