The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk
)
Sat, 6 Jul 1996 12:32:35 +0100
Hiya Folks... Well they tax just about everything else... Wishes & Dreams... - ANDREA xx ************<andrea@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk>************ ******************<ajc6@ukc.ac.uk>******************* *** *** *** THE LOONY BIN *** *** loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk *** *** *** ******************Internet Goddess******************* *********************ANDROMEDA*********************** ------- Forwarded foolishness follows ------- --------------------------------------------------------------------- TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN Notice of Increase In TAXATION Payments The only thing the Australian Taxation Office has not taxed is your Ding Dong. This is due to the face that 40% of the time it is hanging around unemployed, 30% of the time it is hard up, 20% of the time it is pissed off and 10% of the time it is in a hole. On top of this, it has two (2) dependants and they are both nuts. Therefore, by July 1996 your ding dong will be taxed according to its size. To determine your category, please insert this information on Page 2, Section 7, Line 3 on your standard IRS Tax Form. 10 - 12 Inch LUXURY TAX $50.00 8 - 10 Inch POLL TAX $45.00 6 - 8 Inch PRIVILEGE TAX $35.00 4 - 6 Inch NUISANCE TAX $25.00 ANYONE under 4 inches is eligible for a refund. ANYONE exceeding 12 inches (300mm) MUST file under 'Capital Gains'. Please do not request for an extension. Yours faithfully P.Checker Administrator AUSTRALIAN TAXATION OFFICE