P.J.Wise
(
(no email)
)
Sat, 21 Jan 1995 18:21:30 +0000
some jokes :- Q. How many Pentium designers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. 1.99904274017, but that's close enough for non-technical people. Q. What do you get when you cross a pentium PC with a research grant? A. A mad scientist. Q. What's another name for the "Intel Inside" sticker they put on Pentiums? A. The warning label. Q. What algorithm did intel use in the Pentium's floating point divider? A. "Life is like a box of chocolates" Q. Complete the following word analogy: Add is to Subtract as Multiply is to: 1) Divide 2) ROUND 3) RANDOM 4) On a Pentium, all of the above A. Number 4 Q. Why didn't Intel call the Pentium the 586? A. Because they added 486 and 100 on the first Pentium and got 585.999983605 Q. According to Intel, the Pentium conforms to IEEE standards 754 and 854 for floating point arithmetic. If you fly in aircraft designed using a Pentium, what's the correct pronunciation of "IEEE"? A. Aaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeee! TOP TEN NEW INTEL SLOGANS FOR PENTIUM 1.9999103517 We're looking for a few good flaws. 2.9991523619 Why do you think they call it "Floating" point? 3.9998245917 Division considered harmful - No life-maintenance devices should be used with this processor. 4.9999999021 We fixed it, really. 5.9999835137 Redefining the PC - And mathematics as well. 6.9999831538 You don't need to know what's inside. 7.9999414610 Nearly 300 correct opcodes. 8.9999163362 It's close enough, we say so. 9.9999973251 It's a FLAW, dammit, not a bug! ////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// // // // _____..---======~~~~~=======---.._____ // // ______________________ __,-='=====____ ================ _____=====`= // // (._____________________I__) - _-=_/ `--------=+=-------' // // / /__...---===='---+---_' P.J.Wise B.Sc.(Hons) // // '------'---.___ - _ = _.-' pjw@ukc.ac.uk, // // `--------' pwise@nyx.cs.du.edu // // pjw@panther.demon.co.uk // ////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// //// Pretty Good Protection (PGP) Public Key (as of 22/12/94) //// ////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// //// +------------------------------------------------------------------+ //// //// | -----BEGIN PGP PUBLIC KEY BLOCK----- | //// //// | Version: 2.6 | //// //// | | //// //// | mQCNAy75Q24AAAEEAMTougj9KU4/RMYgDVTSfvZp3l8SnkfAmQ+lTvchZunlasHc | //// //// | uMaj2HDYhpvniFyxQ5z48/Hxo3HAbFdVKaL45iYvwvNPv933ZSki/MLvt58gLyeE | //// //// | Q0orWP/Do1kKoN32A4p1q3L+VWznRMiaWf1ayj4JszmVxNJgeldr+kmav5MJAAUR | //// //// | tCZQLiBKLiBXaXNlIEIuU2MuKEhvbnMpIDxwandAdWtjLmFjLnVrPg== | //// //// | =MyR/ | //// //// | -----END PGP PUBLIC KEY BLOCK----- | //// //// +---------------------------------8<--[Cut along dashed line]--8<--+ //// //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////